Bad day, good day: Part 2

On April 12th, 1989, my then-husband and I had tickets to see R.E.M. on their “Green” tour at Maple Leaf Gardens.  For some reason, the hubby couldn’t go, so I went with my best friend, Franca—I seem to recall that I paid for the tickets and she drove.  I didn’t really know much about R.E.M, but working at a radio station, I went to just about every big concert in Toronto just for the sake of going.  The band that opened for R.E.M. that night was the Indigo Girls, and I was mesmerized.  I’d never heard of them, and knew nothing about them, but as soon as they started to play I realized they created the kind of music which touched me on some sort of cellular level; it was like I’d been waiting my entire life to hear them.  During the R.E.M. performance, all I could think about was running down the street to “Sam, the Record Man” to buy their CD, and once I did, it was pretty much all I listened to.  I know it sounds so sappy and dramatic and teenager-ish, but I just loved the Indigo Girls.  I was going through some very difficult challenges (I was married and realizing I was gay), and I latched onto their music as both distraction and inspiration.  Between 1989 and 1996, I saw the Girls in concert at least a dozen times, and would even travel to see them.  I still have an Indigo Girls tattoo on my left arm - I got it sixteen years ago.  I once did the whole “standing outside the stage door” thing (I believe that was in Ithaca, at Cornell… or it was at Artpark in Lewiston, NY), and I have a jacket with Amy and Emily’s signatures on it—Amy even drew a little guitar. The last time I saw them was in 1997 in Santa Fe at the Paolo Soleri Amphitheatre—almost a decade ago.  When Flippy and I settled in Las Vegas in 1999, the Indigo Girls played a couple of shows here, but we didn’t have much money, Flippy wasn’t a fan, and the shows were the “general admission; no seating” types which are murder for us old folks.  The Girls eventually had some sort of a disagreement with a casino about displaying their activism material on casino property, and I believe they made some sort of statement indicating they wouldn’t be returning to Vegas again.

All that is just background for why Flippy surprised me with tickets to the True Colors Tour, once she found out the Indigo Girls would be appearing.  The tour was created by Cyndi Lauper as a show of support for gay rights, and features artists such as Debbie Harry, Erasure, and Margaret Cho.  We don’t usually do “gay stuff”, but Flippy knew I’d be thrilled because Las Vegas was the only show the Indigo Girls would appear in.  She bought the tickets back in April, and the concert was yesterday (Friday) evening.  We were afraid we wouldn’t be able to go because of Frank’s temporary disappearance, so I’m glad the little brat decided to come home so that we could go out.

The show was really super.  Dresden Dolls opened, and they were entertaining and weird, in a good way.  They signed autographs after their set, and eventually I’ll upload a photo or two to my Flickr account.  The Indigo Girls were next, and although it felt like “coming home again”, they only performed five songs and I felt sort of empty afterwards.  They were also musically out of place compared to the sound of the other performers, and I’ve since been digging through their tour schedule, trying to find some place I could go see them in a full concert.  I miss them—I have a case of musical homesickness.  If anyone else has seen them before, they sound as good as ever, but have changed up the harmonies on songs like, “Closer to Fine”, I guess to make them more interesting to sing.  It’s got to be tough singing the same songs for two decades.  Debbie Harry was next—she was in good voice, but she looked old (I’m sorry, Debbie).  She barely moved around, and it felt a bit like I was watching my Mom.  After that was Erasure, who put on a very cool visual performance, sounded great, and were oh, so gay.  Finally, Cyndi Lauper took the stage, singing all of her “classics”, including a version of “She-Bop” which could have been arranged by Tom Petty.  She was very laid back and funny, especially because she kept having “wardrobe malfunctions” with her dress, and eventually had to borrow a jacket from a guy in the audience so she could cover up.  I love her for wearing an expensive, fancy dress while barefoot, too.  At the end of the show, all the performers except Debbie Harry came back on-stage to sing “True Colors”, and Erasure’s version of “Take a Chance on Me”.  I worried that the concert would be full of long and boring breaks between artists, but Margaret Cho hosted and did stand-up between sets.  In a special surprise, Rosie O’Donnell also showed up and did some stand-up, and she played percussion on a couple of Cyndi Lauper songs.  She was actually quite talented—she’s either a natural, or she’s taken extensive lessons.  After the concert there was an afterparty at Studio 54, and we wanted to attend, but the line to get in was huge, and the cover charge was $40 each.  We found a nice gay man who borrowed our cell phone to make a call, and who then offered to let us go in with him in the VIP line, but the cover charge made our decision for us and we just came home.

I’m in an odd mood today, a combination of Frank’s disappearance, Indigo Girls’ melancholy, and a nostalgia about being gay.  The concert reminded me that I miss “being” gay—since we left San Francisco, we just “pass” most places, and have no gay friends.  We don’t go “gay” things—we just live our lives.  Normally, I’d use those sorts of statements to argue that being gay isn’t any different than being straight, but there is a cultural connection to other gay people which feels comfortable and affirming.  Flippy and I really do hide most aspects of lives from almost everyone, even family, because we have a constant sense of wanting to make others comfortable.  I think that “passing” takes no effort, and is no big deal, but it is.  I just didn’t realize it until I was with a few thousand other gay people.  I also had an awful sense of feeling “safe” while at the concert, which shocked me because I hadn’t realized how much caution I expend in my regular day-to-day dealings with the general public.  I don’t think I live in fear of a hate crime, but on some subconscious level I must, because I wanted to stay in the atmosphere of that concert hall forever.

If I could get just one message out from this blog entry, I want to thank Cyndi Lauper for organizing this event.  She obviously didn’t have to do this, yet she was so concerned about the lack of equal rights for gay people that she invested a huge amount of time and effort to organize the performers, obtain sponsors, etc.  She gave a very heartfelt speech at the concert about how she was inspired by the emails she’s received from gay fans who feel an affinity to the song, “True Colors”, and was further encouraged to take action after meeting Matthew Shepherd’s mother.  I hope the rest of the tour is a huge success for everyone involved, and if it’s in your city, I encourage you to go see it, whether you’re gay or straight.  There were lots of straight couples in attendance this evening, and everyone had a lot of fun.

Oh, and to the Indigo Girls—please start coming back to Vegas again.  Yes, the city is a big capitalistic mess, but I miss you.

Posted by Leigh-Ann on 06/09 at 12:23 PM

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  1. Glad you got to catch a great concert and felt so good there.  That’s the way everyone should feel every day in this world. Unfortunately, our differences sometimes prevent this..but in the veryend..the next world, we’re all the same.

    Posted by Ruth  on  06/12  at  04:09 AM

  2. I enjoyed Flippy’s review of the show and yours, too.  I’m glad you got to see the Indigo Girls again!  They’re playing a couple of shows in Atlanta in July - you know you’d have at least two places to stay if you guys came for a visit. :-)

    Posted by Nancy  on  06/14  at  03:58 AM
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